Friday, 24 April 2015

Dream 419

'Suicidal Brother'
Dream date: 23 April 2015

Day 2 of 14-Day Dream Incubation Experiment - The 'Dream Town' Dream
This is Day 2 of my 14-Day Dream Incubation Experiment. Click on the red link to access the article which explains the experiment.

In this dream - which consisted of one short dream scene - I was the 'brother' dream character (as in, I witnessed some of the dream from his perspective), but also an observer in the third-person perspective and from the perspective of a participant in the action (the 'sister'). I am not sure how my perspective shifted from myself, to the third person and then to the 'brother' character.

The dream started with me as a female - with a mother, two sisters and two brothers. We lived in a very old, gothic-looking castle, which resembled something out of Game of Thrones. Everything was dark, lit only by candlelight. My family and I were in one room, which was a living-area, resembling the images I have found on the internet (see below) - of course, the layout of the room and the decor was slightly different, but I cannot recall specific details, so I am able to just present a basic idea. I cannot recall what my family member dream characters looked like, but we were dressed in medieval-style clothes and all the females had long, flowing hair. I was aware that my brother was about to commit suicide, and this was something which could not be stopped. 

My female relatives and I were trying to persuade him not to, without avail. We followed him (hurriedly, anxiously) into a bedroom chamber, which was adjacent to the living-area. This room was similarly dark and candle-lit. As you entered the room, in front of the door was a huge bed. To the right was an open doorway, with a long stone passage visible. To the left was furniture and a window. My brother was intending to kill humself by falling on a sword, but my sisters and I were trying to tell him to use some poison. This poison was in the form of a number of large pink sugar-cube objects which were laid out in a square formation on the bed. I told him that this was his intended method of suicide. 

The perspective then switched to third-person (passive observer) and I could see myself pleading with my brother to swallow the pink sugar-cubes instead of using the sword. 

My perspective then switched to that of my suicidal brother. I felt harassed by my female family members. Then, my older brother entered the chamber via the open doorway. I had seen him walk down the stone hallway. He was carrying a large object which looked like a blender/juicer or some other kitchen appliance. I realised that this older brother was BDO - a friend of DL, who is also a Facebook friend of mine. He was a large man with a big beard. He had a joking expression on his face and seemed to be unemotional and ruthless about my suicide/death. The 'kitchen appliance' object was a tool to help me kill myself, but it became apparent that my brother was going to use it to kill me himself - so murder me. He shook the appliance and then turned it on, and I could see liquid churning and splashing away inside the clear glass/plastic part. I woke up.

TIME: 09:00 - 12;00 hours, then WBTB: 12:15 - 13:15 hours
LUCIDITY: None
SPECIAL NOTES:  14-Day Dream Incubation Experiment:
  1. MILD Technique 
  2. Dream Incubation methods
  3. Dream Visualisation methods
  4. Wake-Back-To-Bed method - this dream took place in the hour-long WBTB period

Dreamsigns:
  • I was part of a different family (IA - Inner Awareness/C - Context)
  • Shifting perspective (IA - Inner Awareness/A - Action/C - Context)
  • The whole dream was very much a dreamsign (IA - Inner Awareness/A - Action'F - Form/C - Context)

Recurrent Dream Themes:
  • Having a different family - including sister(s)

Potential Day/Dream Residue:
  • Game of Thrones, Season 5 is currently being aired and there is a lot of discussion and promotion of it on the internet.
  • I read about suicide in relation to Kurt Cobain and the forthcoming Montage of Heck (2015) shortly before this dream took place.

Waking Thoughts & Emotions:

This dream was very negative in content, but did not leave me with any specific waking thoughts or emotions, other than disappointment that the content did not seem in any way connetced to my intended dream incubation.

* I have recalled most aspects of this dream.

Interpretation/Analysis:
This dream was obviously far-removed from my intended dream incubation theme and did not seem to share any links at all. I interpret the suicide as being an alternative between an aggressive act (falling on a sword) and a passive-aggressive act (consuming a pink sugar-cube). In the days leading up to this dream I had (on a number of occasions) expressed my desire - as a woman - to be treated in a raw, lustful, sexualised manner as opposed to a sensitive and  sweet romantic one by my partners in relationships. Therefore, it is possible to read the act of falling on a sword as a form of brutal and violent penetration, in contrast to the sweeter method of consuming a sugar-cube. I feel that my dream ego was experiencing both my feminine and masculine identities in this dream. 

A couple of days before this dream, DL and I had discussed the fact that I have a number of obvious masculine qualities which are more predominant in my personality than my female ones. I had been discussing gender roles and sex/relationships with a male friend - who had been put-off by my frank disclosure than I hate romance and sensitivity from a male partner, and like to be sexually objectifed in my physical relationships with boyfriends because I enjoy that more than sweetness and affection (which does not turn me on, but instead makes me feel uncomfortable).

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