Sunday, 6 December 2015

Dream 521

'My University Nightmare'
Dream date:  4 December 2015 (Day 4 of Lucid December)

This is Day 4 of Lucid December, where I attempt to induce as many lucid dreams as possible using various induction techniques, described below.

Scene 1: My Teaching (Seminar) Room at University - Day

I was in the room in TEC (a new teaching block) in which I teach undergraduate Law students. The class was full, but not with the actual real-life students I teach as my job - just dream character students. I sat in my normal seat and went to take the register (in real-life I just get my students to sign on a piece of paper). The names were all in pencil, but I could not read them - they were unpronounceable, or nonsensical names. I was struggling to try and pronounce the name of a mixed race male, which looked like: 'Farrahaharraha' or something similar (this is how I recall the name to have been written). The students were becoming fractious an frustrated with me. I stepped outside the class for a moment, so that I could calm myself, as I felt anxious and inadequate at my job. When I entered the class again, all the students were standing up and they started shouting loudly (in anger and excitement) and throwing screwed-up balls of paper and plastic bottles at me in a violent way. I made attempts to pacify them, but to no avail. I had to escape from the class in fear. 

Scene 2: The Law School at University - Day
I went to the Law School - although this did not look like my real-life Law School. It was a typical office, with nothing out of the ordinary. I was sitting on a sofa and was joined by an Administrative Officer - this was a short white female, of approximately 40 - 50 years of age, with black hair in a shoulder-length bob with a fringe. Something about the female annoyed me, although I am not sure exactly what. While I was talking to her (I am not sure what we were talking about), she tried to grab my mobile phone aggressively, and as a response I started smashing it into her leg, making her scream out in pain. 

I was then told - by the female and my mum, who had randomly joined us - that I had to go and be assessed for fitness to study and fitness to practice Law professionally, as a result of my violent behaviour. I was shocked and stunned and felt that I had only reacted to the female's own violence in grabbing my phone. My mum told me that I had nothing to worry about. We started walking to the place where the assessment meeting would take place.

Scene 3: The Dean of Students Office at University - Day
I was in the Dean of Students Office (where I work part-time in real-life) - but it did not look like it does in real-life. It was a larger building, with more twisting corridors and partial walls, separating areas of the main room. I was told that the meeting would take place in my boss (DT's) office - which was in a different place in the dream. I was protesting, saying: 'I won't do professional practice them! I'll just be a scholar!' but the female dream character (the Admin Officer) and my mum were telling me that this was not an option and I must be assessed. There was a set of Chinese folding screens which were where the waiting area is in real-life. These were white and had a lattice design. I pushed the Admin Officer into the middle of the screen and slammed it shut onto her. screaming: 'This is what you get for bringing me here!' I was accusing her to setting me up - I perceived that it was her fault that I had hit her leg with my phone and now was attacking her with the Chinese screens. I was also shocked that I could not control my anger. DT came to the door of his office and called us in. I do not remember the conversation that was held, but as I left his office, and went back into the main part of the room, I was aware (from the conversation I was having with my mum) that I had been let off from my actions and that everything was going to be OK. I did not feel relieved however, as I was still perturbed by the recent events. I was also aware that the incident would 'remain on my record' which I felt was unfair.

Scene 4: The Seaside (Sheringham?) - Day
My mum and I were then at the seaside - it may be that we were in Sheringham. The idea was that a change of scenery might help me forget the incidents at university and calm me down. It was a grey rainy day.

TIME: 02:00 - 08:00 hours (then awake until 08:15 hours) & 08:15 - 10:15 hours (WB2B Method) - this dream took place during second section of sleep (therefore following WB2B)
  • Cognitive induction techniques, adapted from the MILD Technique & Tholey's Combined Technique to induce a DILD (Dream-Initiate/Induced Lucid Dream) - critical reflection (in conjunction with reality checking - see below); intention; auto-suggestion; affirmations before sleep and during WB2B - 10 minutes prior to sleep; 10 minutes during WB2B 
  • Reality checks (target: 15 - 20 a day); actual: 11 (moderate-good)
  • Wake Back to Bed Method (WB2B) - sleep for approximately 5 - 6 hours (to attain all necessary deep sleep; or where sleep deprived, wake naturally without an alarm), wake for 10 - 15 minutes; perform cognitive techniques; sleep for a further 45 - 90 minutes, during which I will hopefully be in the 'best' REM stage of the sleep cycle for lucid dreaming - slept for 6 hours; woke with an alarm; performed cognitive techniques for 15 minutes; went to sleep for 2 hours

Dream Information:

None of note

  • I could not read the strange names on my register
  • The actions of the students in my class
  • The appearance of the Law School
  • My actions towards the Administrative Officer in the Law School
  • The appearance of the Dean of Students Office

Recurrent Dream Themes
  • None of note

Potential Day/Dream Residue:
  • I had held a seminar in the TEC room on the day of this dream
  • I had a team meeting with my boss in the Dean of Students Office the day of this dream - during which we discussed procedures for referring a student for Fitness to Study assessments or - where the student is on a 'professional' course, such as medicine - assessments as to whether the student is able to continue on this course where their health or behaviour suggests they are not suitable for professional placement
  • The day of this dream I had written a legal letter for my friend, RD, who had been fired from his workplace - despite being told by his line-manager than he 'had nothing to worry about' - a line which I had quoted in the letter of appeal to the Managing Director of his former workplace. I also referred to incidents recorded on his 'employee record'

Waking Thoughts & Emotions:
This dream was experienced as a nightmare - I was so anxious and scared throughout and could not change my (violent) behaviour in the later scenes to improve my situation. It seemed that I was very helpless in this dream.

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