Friday, 1 April 2016

Dream 599

Dream date: 30 March 2016

This is Day 31 of my Dream Incubation Experiment. You can read the details and methodology of my latest Dream Incubation Experiment by clicking HERE

Scene 1: An Interior Scene (Location Unknown) - Time Unknown
I was with EG in a room. I cannot recall much about the scene, but it seemed to be a downstairs room and some of the furniture was red. The memory of 'red' was quite dominant when I woke up from this dream. 

In this dream, I wanted to be with EG and EG wasn't saying 'no' or rejecting me, but he told me that he had to go out for a while, because he had to go and meet another woman, 'Gemma' (a dream character). I was telling him that he didn't need to go and see Gemma, and that he would be better staying here with me. EG was agreeing that he would rather be with me, but was insisting that he had made plans to see Gemma and was obliged to go. He was saying that he would only be a few hours and then he would come back to me. I asked him if he was going to have sex with Gemma while he was there (the understanding be that he was going to her house). EG said that he was going to have sex with her - he did not seem apologetic about it, or boastful - just like it was an assumed fact, it was obvious that this would happen. I had a sense of his masculinity and self-assuredness in the way he was acting, calm and dominant at the same time. I started mocking EG saying: 'Gemma's got a baby' or words to that effect - in the dream I was aware that this woman 'Gemma' had a young child - or children - and that she was a single mother. In mocking EG, I was suggesting that Gemma was desperate for any man to be a 'daddy' and implying he would be better with me, a childless single woman with no responsibilities. I kept making references to Gemma being a single mother and trying to provoke EG, but he was being really calm and fixed on going to see her. 

I then decided to tell EG that Gemma was 'fat'. In the dream, I knew that she was - I saw what she looked like at this point (in my mind's eye - she was a white woman with a very orange fake tan, quite large (yes, 'fat'), with dyed gingery-red hair and large hoop earrings). EG said he knew she was fat and that I was more attractive and sexier than her, but kept reaffirming to me that he had made these plans and was going to see them through. I ran over and grabbed both of his arms, pleading with him. I didn't feel sad, just frustrated - but had a very playful, childish way of trying to persuade him. The whole scene felt 'passive' despite the fact I was trying to be provocative and EG was refusing to do what I wanted him to do. I didn't even feel like he was 'cheating' on me in the dream - it seemed like I was aware that he wasn't my boyfriend and that this 'relationship' (or whatever it was compelling me to try to make him stay with me) was purely sexual/casual. It was just my ego could not accept that EG was going to go and have sex with a single mother that he admitted was not as attractive as me, then come back to be with me, when I was offering that he just stay here. 

EG then said - or I asked him, because the idea was in my mind - that he had a neck tattoo with Gemma's name. I have a feeling I asked him about it, because when I found out that he did, I had the feeling of my suspicions being confirmed. I cannot explain what I mean, but it felt like I had expected he would have a tattoo of Gemma's name, but hoped that it wasn't true. He showed me the was red and in the 'Lobster' font/typeface - basically it was the font/colour of this Blog title! The tattoo looked a little like this:


EG had to pull his collar down to show me the tattoo. In a last ditch attempt to stop EG from having sex with Gemma, I said: 'Let's kill Gemma!' I was still holding on to EG's arms. He was interested to know what I meant. I said: 'When you go to see her, we can kill her!' I think I might have been serious in the dream - it didn't seem at all like a bad decision. EG said that we could not kill Gemma. I cannot recall what else happened in this dream scene.

Scene 2: The gravel path which goes part-way around the perimeter of my university campus, by the lake (Norwich) - Dusk or Dawn
I was walking towards campus, on the gravel path which goes around to the lake. I was alone and it was either dusk or dawn as the light was dim, but still light enough to see clearly. By the side of the path - to my right, so against the fence which separates the plant nursery from the path - I saw a magazine laying on the ground. I stopped to look at the cover (without bending down and picking it up). The magazine was called: 'Pregnancy & Shitting'.

I cannot recall anything else about this dream.

TIME: 23:00 - 07:00 hours (I woke up from this dream)

Dream Information:

  • EG was a male I had a very casual relationship with previously - I wasn't interested in taking it further as there was limited chemistry and I prefered someone else, so couldn't see the point in continuing with it, considering he was quite attentive and I found that claustrophobic 

  • I wanted to be with EG - despite this clearly not being the case in my real-life - EG was available and it was me who was not interested

Recurrent Dream Themes:

  • None of note

Potential Day/Dream Residue:

  • In Dream 598 - 'She Doesn't Even Care About Her Brain Being on Show' - I mentioned in the Potential Day/Dream Residue section that Dream 598 may have been influenced by a true crime show I had been watching, Britain's Darkest Taboos, in particular, the episode 'My Disabled Daughter: Tortured and Murdered by her Friends' (S05E03). In this show, the victim was named 'Gemma'
  • I had been walking on the path that goes round to the lake on my university campus, the days prior to this dream - I regularly walk here, usually at dusk or dawn, which are the 2 times I am likely to take a walk as I like the solitude and atmosphere as the sun sets or rises
  • The day of this dream I had written a status on my Facebook about how, in promoting my recent article - Pregnancy & Dreaming (click on title link for article to open in a new window) - I had to search for relevant social media pages, which made my browser target me with advertising aimed at pregnant women and new mothers. One of my online friends said maybe I was being subconsciously prepared for motherhood - I think he assumed my reference to a Blog post on pregnancy and dreaming meant I had dreamed about being pregnant myself. I told him that it was a general information article, not a personal one and I have no plans to ever have children as I do not have any maternal instincts, and am happy being on my own and independent, even when it comes down to co-dependent relationships with men!
  • The day of this dream I had been reading a Buzzfeed article about people's most embarrassing diarrhea stories - just a collection of stories where people shit themselves (most of the entries were from females, a point noted in the comments below the article)

Waking Thoughts & Emotions:
This dream was not completely related to my Dream Incubation Experiment, although I did suggest that we 'kill Gemma', who was my 'love rival' in this dream. This dream was quite interesting to have, but I think I have forgotten most of the interesting parts, given when it came to recording the dream, it didn't seem to have much significant content.

* I may have forgotten some aspects of this dream. If I recall anything else later, I will record it below.

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