Tuesday, 14 May 2013

Dream Incubation Experiment

Tonight (Monday 13 May 2013) I am going to commence a series of experiments in dream incubation. As I have been practising dream techniques for a while now, I feel I am ready to make some serious attempts at dream incubation. This is how my experiment will operate:

I will choose a desired dream scenario/topic at the start of the week (Monday). I will record my chosen topic on this Blog. Throughout the week I will try to incubate (‘planting the seed’) the desired dream, by concentrating my waking mind, throughout the day, on the possibility of experiencing it in a dream-state; and thinking about the desired dream during the period before falling asleep. This is a technique described in a study by Deirdre Barrett at Harvard University (Barrett’s Study on Dream Incubation (1993), Dreaming, vol. 3, no. 2) and described in her book, The Committee of Sleep: How Artists, Scientists and Athletes Use Their Dreams for Creative Problem-Solving – And How You Can Too (Crown Books/Random House, New York: 2001). Dream incubation can be used for problem-solving or simply recreation. I will record my dreams as they occur, as normal, and compare the results with my dream incubation aim.

This week my desired dream scenario/topic is: A successful legal interview for a pupillage.

Dream Incubation (Day 1 - 13 May 2013)
These are the notes that I recorded as soon as I woke up. This dream will be posted as usual on my  main Dream Diary (Dream 163), but I also want to comment on it here. Clearly, the first day of dream incubation did not work, as the dream was not about legal interviews/pupillages. However, there are some strange elements, which reflect what happened in my waking life the day before I had this dream. For example, there is clear evidence of the Light and Mirror dream control experiment (follow link for article) appearing as a topic in this dream. I had been typing up this experiment (on a laptop) shortly prior to going to bed. The reference to laundry and piles of clothes may come from the fact that I had a huge pile of washing in my bedroom which I had been planning to sort out yesterday, but had forgotten/not bothered to do. I put it in a large laundry bag to keep it separate from my clean clothes. My nan asking me about whether I was studying politics may have been because we had had a conversation about politicians earlier in the day, and while I was typing up the Light and Mirror dream control experiment she asked me if I was doing my university law work, to which I had replied 'no'. I saw some pigs in a Norfolk field a few days before I had this dream, which may have influenced the image of the pig in the dream. Also, earlier in the day, I had cooked some curry in a big saucepan on the cooker and my nan had asked me if I wanted her to stir it. Further, I had spoken to my nan about my ex-boyfriend returning to Burma and the fact my late granddad originated from 'Bermondsey' in London. There had been some publicity about the local carnivals which would be happening this summer, and the neighbours who I saw walking past the window had been visited by an ambulance earlier in the day, because one of them had suddenly fallen ill. My nan had been watching the ambulance arrive from the living-room window. My nan and I had decided also that we would go to Norwich in the week and would visit UEA while we were there. Last time I was at university I had been standing outside Suffolk Terrace, trying to enter the library via the late-access door (I failed, because my swipe card wouldn't work).

Dream Incubation (Day 2 - 14 May 2013)
I had in fact been sunbathing a lot in the garden which appeared in this dream, which may account for that appearing. I am not sure where the other references come from - particularly the gold tooth and getting bit. When I was very young (from about 13 years, throughout teenage years before university) my friends and I used to go into the public toilets to smoke. I had recently been down the seafront and bumped into my old friend SF, who I had not seen in a very long time. She is now a mother and was with her young son. I saw her when I was going for a walk with another friend, and the very spot she was sitting was one of our favourite locations when we were kids. There was no observed affects from the dream incubation experiment. This dream is written up in full at Dream 164.

Dream Incubation (Day 3 - 15 May 2013)
This dream was SO strange - not necessarily the bit about working in a strip club, as I have done that before when I needed money and actually enjoyed the experience (it was nothing like in this dream, however - the dancers were not allowed to be alone with the clients and we were not propositioned for sex either). The strangest bit was my family trying to encourage me to take drugs, as that is not something that would ever happen in reality, although they might encourage me to seek medicine for anxiety if I am currently experiencing problems with emotional/mental health. This dream is recorded at Dream 165. Again, there is no known affect from the dream incubation experiment.

Dream Incubation (Day 4 - 16 May 2013)
Again, this dream, like all the others seems to be proving to me that my dream incubation experiment has not been working. I am not sure what may have influenced this dream. I spoke to HM on the telephone around the time of this dream and in my nan's house where I am currently living, there are many photographs of me and HM as children hanging on the walls, which may have inspired me to dream of her as a child. This dream in recorded in full at Dream 166.

Dream Incubation (Day 5 - 17 May 2013)
This is really weird, as until now (some months later when I am updating my Blog after a hiatus - from having no internet available) I had forgotten this dream - mainly because it wasn't particularly significant in terms of content. I had applied for a job as a Senior Resident at university (the same job was previously called Resident Tutor) and I am able to say now, sitting here on campus, that I luckily did get the job! Obviously, that was on my mind at the time of having this dream. The odd thing is though, recently EB and I were talking about what we should call him if he needed a fake identity and I said: "Frank". I had totally forgotten that I had a dream in which he was called 'Frank' and I have no idea why that came to mind, other than my nan had been talking about Frank Sinatra and I had mentioned Frank Sinatra to EB. We also both like Amy Winehouse, who's first album was called Frank and we had laughed about the drugs helpline, Ask Frank. This dream is recorded at Dream 167.

Dream Incubation (Day 6 & 7 - 18 & 19 May 2013)

So, clearly my dream incubation experiment was not successful. I am not sure why, but can guess that perhaps one week is not long enough for a first time experiment such as this to work. I think I will try this again in the near future to see if I can achieve better results.

Dream 163

I was in a classroom which was well-lit - it was as if I was back at school. I was with a group of unfamiliar students - all young people, one of whom was a tall white male with black hair and a white T-shirt. He seemed to be taking control of our group. We were sorting bundles of clothes for a charity collection of some sort. We were aware that a group of businessmen would be coming to take the clothing collection soon. I was then engaged elsewhere in the room, with a project entitled Switch & Mirror (a clear reference to the dream control experiment I had been writing about prior to falling asleep- follow link to see article). I was typing my project on an old-fashioned PC, but kept making spelling mistakes, especially with the word 'switch' which kept being typed as 'scitch'. The scene changed and I was outside the Suffolk Terrace block at UEA, in the dark. I was seated in front of the PC (on a desk) still typing, and the dark-haired male was with me, helping me. I was then at my nan's house, standing next to her at the cooker in the kitchen. She was stirring a large cooking pot. There was a very pink pig on the ground, between my legs. My nan asked "are you studying politics?" and I said 'no'. I was then in the bathroom, with the PC balanced on the edge of the bath, while I sat on the toilet, typing. I was still making spelling mistakes. I then experienced a false awakening, in my bedroom (no lucidity). Outside my window (which is second floor), I could see the heads of our neighbours and their family members, walking past the house. They were discussing a visit to 'Burmsy/Bermsy' carnival. My nan entered the room at this point, with a laundry bag of clean washing - I could see a sparkly skirt and denim hotpants (which I own in real-life) on the top of the pile. 

The Light & the Mirror Experiment – Testing the limits of dream control

This article is based on research by Stephan LaBerge and Lynne Levitan (2007) into methods of control in lucid dreaming. LaBerge and Levitan stated that it may be possible to test lucid dream control by setting predetermined experiments enabling the dreamer to attempt to achieve certain goals. The definition of ‘control’ within this context is the “ability to determine or influence the course of events” within the dream scenario. 

The dreamer's actions are causes which lead to consequences and effects. However, there must be some distinction between voluntary and involuntary control. Voluntary control means that the dreamer decides to produce specific effects and takes steps to cause them. Involuntary control refers to unintended consequences of the dreamer’s actions. There are many different ways of controlling dreams. One method which does not require a state of lucidity is predetermination – selecting the scenario or subject of the dream prior to sleep. This is very similar to the concept of ‘dream incubation’ in which the dreamer seeks to induce a dream about an important or desired topic in order to answer a relevant question or resolve a conflict (see Patricia Garfield, Creative Dreaming (1995) in which she suggests that a motivated dreamer can choose to dream about desired topics and produces evidence in support of her thesis). 

Post-hypnotic suggestion has also been utilised in order to elicit particular dream topics, again with some degree of success, as described by Charles Tart, Conscious Mind, Sleeping Brain (1988). It should be noted that success in creating a specific dream scenario does not imply an ability to control the sequence of events within the dream. Concurrent control is the ability to alter or determine the course of the dream in ‘real-time’ i.e. as it is happening. This type of dream control is not limited to lucid dreams – any time the dreamer makes a choice or decision in a dream, this is a form of dream control. The dreamer may be unconscious for the reason for making this choice, but the decision nevertheless originates from the self. However, dreamers possessing full lucid consciousness within a dream are able to make deliberate choices and actions with full knowledge that they are experiencing a dream and are able to observe their effects on the course of the dream narrative.

A wide range of theories about the possibility and limits of dream control exist in dream discourse. On one end of the spectrum, some dream researchers deny the possibility of deliberate dream control and even the notion that lucid dreaming is a proven phenomenon. Their beliefs tend to stem from a flawed philosophy that sleep is an intrinsically ‘unconscious’ state with a lack of cognition and mental awareness. LaBerge and Levitan prefer to use the operational definition of sleep as ‘lack of perceptual awareness of the sleeper’s environment’. Without consciousness, clearly a dreamer would be wholly unable to will anything. 

Other scepticism surrounding the possibility of conscious dream control emerges from dream researchers who employ dreams to help subjects achieve better psychological or emotional balance. A large extent of dream-based theory operates on the premise that dreams simply happen to dreamers rather than being events created by the dreamer. Thus, the ‘creator’ of the dream is the subconscious – completely disconnected from the conscious ‘ego’. LaBerge and Levitan state this cannot be accurate as it would prohibit us from recalling our dream experiences – events which do not reach the conscious mind cannot be accessible to the memory. 

The dreaming self – who experiences and reflects on the events of the dream – is the self-aware, conscious ‘ego’, although it may not be aware that the present dream environment is an entirely mentally-constructed world which is not guided by sensory information from the physical reality. In Ullman & Zimmerman, Working with Dreams (1979), the authors – who assert that dreams are a product of the unconscious – argue that a dream is a form of natural resource flowing through the self, shaped by life experience. The flow of this natural resource cannot be changed by urging a new direction upon it. However, if there is an effort to make a change in direction possible, this flow will consequently alter as required. 

This means that there must be more than conscious intent to alter the flow of the dream – there must be a genuine emotional investment. Therefore, dreams are predetermines ‘plays’ programmed out of the dreamer’s current psychological processes, which are nothing like waking-life. In regard to lucid dreaming, the authors state that although the dreamer can influence the subsequent course of a dream once lucidity has been achieved, the element of control occurs only within certain limits i.e. within a predetermined framework. This implies that dream control is restricted to actions appropriate to the original dream scenario which has its own defined boundaries and rules. This would mean that whatever part of the mind which determines the original dream scenario has primacy over other parts of the mind (within the dream-state). 

Despite evidence that some dreamers can pre-determine (incubate) specific dream scenarios and topics, for the most part dream scenarios appear to originate from some source which is not part of the conscious mind. However, there is no solid evidence for Ullman and Zimmerman’s theory that dream control is limited by the framework of the original dream scenario and many dreamers refute this, based on their own experience. For example, Tibetan Buddhists – creators of ‘Dream Yoga’ believe that it is possible to control every aspect of dream imagery and use dream control as a method of comprehending the illusory nature of all experiences, with the ultimate goal of transcending the Relative and embracing the Absolute. In “Doctrine of the Dream State” from Tibetan Yoga and Secret Doctrines, translated by Evans-Wentz, the dreamer is instructed to realise the form or matter of the dream imagery in all its dimensional aspects is entirely subject to the dreamer’s will once mental powers have been sufficiently developed by the dreamer. The dreamer learns from actual experience – resulting from psychic experimentation – that the character of any dream can be changed by transforming or willing that it shall be. A step further, he learns that all forms in the dream-state and all multitudinous content of dreams are merely ‘playthings of the mind’ and therefore are as unstable as a mirage. He will then gain knowledge that the essential nature of form and sensual perceptions in the waking state are equally as ‘unreal’ as their reflexes in the dream-state. 

The Tibetan Buddhists, however, were not given to sharing their personal dream experiences and so it is not possible to examine the nature of their dreams and their efforts and successes in controlling them.

Some notable Western dream experts give insight into their experiences and what they have been able to accomplish. The Marquis d’Hervey de Saint-Denys was an extraordinarily successful lucid dreamer who wrote instructively about his dream experiences. In his study, Dreams and How to Guide Them (1867) he stated that those dreamers who perceive their dreams to be a mere succession of mechanically produced impressions over which there is no possibility of control may lack the necessary will or effort to produce any results in dream control. Therefore, attention and will are the two essential elements necessary in taking the first steps in directing and modifying the course of dreams.

One of the most prolific lucid dreamers is Alan Worsley, who is thought to be the first dream researcher able to signal lucidity with eye movements, in controlled experiments within a dream laboratory. He states that “non-lucid dreams use many principles that can be used in lucid dreams. For instance, it is likely, in a non-lucid dream, that if one believes that one looks into a book about a certain subject, one will find relevant pictures in it. In lucid dreaming, one can use this principle by deliberately selecting a book about a subject which ones wishes to study.” Worsely has documented his attempts to influence dreams, rating the various tasks as Easy, Medium and Difficult based on the percentage of times he was able to succeed at them. He finds that all attempts to penetrate dream matter with his dream body as ‘Easy’. Additionally, making sounds by striking items or speaking is also rated as ‘Easy’, as is reading simple words or short phrases, although reading long phrases is ‘Difficult’. He has never been able to suddenly turn on a light in a dark room, although he has been able to do so easily in a light room. Flying close to the ground was ‘easy’ but this task would become progressively more difficult the higher he would try to go.

LaBerge and Levitan suggest that because dreams are illusory in nature it should be (in theory) possible to experience anything imaginable. Thus, failures at dream control may arise due to an insufficiently strong imagination or not believing that a certain experience is possible. On the other hand, there may be psychological limitations on the ability to influence and control dream imagery. Their theoretical approach to dream control is based on the notion that perceptual experiences in dreaming arise from the same areas of brain activity involved in producing perceptual experiences in waking-life. This may be why people sometimes have difficulty in distinguishing dream experiences from waking experiences and have to employ special techniques to recognise that they are actually dreaming. 

Physiological constraints in dream perception may occur if the brain area is not in a state conducive to the desired dream experience. For example, it may be difficult to make a dark dream light because the visual cortex is not sufficiently active during the dream-state. The authors wish to see further research into the relationship between dream perception and brain activity to test this hypothesis. The NightLight Study (Freefall issue - no. 4, vol. 4) was designed to assess how successfully dreamers would be at accomplishing certain well-defined tasks whilst experiencing a lucid dream-state.

Light Switch Tasks
The dreamer is tasked with finding a light switch indoors, turning it on and seeing what happens. They then must turn the light switch off and see what happens. Next, they must turn the light switch on and off by willing it to happen and observe the results. In subjects, these tasks were counterbalanced, so some subjects used the physical switch first and some used ‘magic’ first.

Mirror Tasks
The dreamer is tasked with finding a mirror and observing their reflection. They then must move their hand to their face, whilst watching in the mirror and observing how their reflection behaves. Next, they must pass through the mirror and see what is on the other side.

Results of the Tasks 
These tasks represented a variety of types of dream influence – ranging from tasks which are easy to accomplish in waking and impossible in waking. In addition, some tasks might be impeded by brain state. The purpose was to see what effect belief might have on the outcome of the task. The subjects were asked to try to perform each task in the waking-state, prior to attempting the same tasks in a lucid dream-state so that they were well-rehearsed in the required procedure. They then had to try each task at least once during a lucid dream. They did not have to complete all tasks in one single dream, but instead, could utilise as many lucid dreams as necessary to attempt each task. So that they would not forget details, the subjects were asked to awaken immediately after the experimental lucid dreams and report on their experiences.

27 subjects submitted reports – 14 women and 13 men.  In total there were 65 lucid dream reports, an average of 1.4 per subject. The maximum number of reports from a single subject was four. The reports were assessed by a judge, who rated each task as a ‘success’ or ‘failure’. The results of the tasks received scores of ‘expected’ if the result achieved the goal or ‘unexpected’ if something unpredictable occurred. Examples of ‘unexpected’ results included “the [light] bulb slowly filled with what appeared to be thick, black tar”; the outside porch light coming on instead of the room light when the switch was used; a hallucinogenic breakdown of the reflected mirror image (finger detaching from hand/holes appearing in face/finger disappearing into mouth); or a reflection which did not resemble that of the dreamer. ‘No result’ meant that no effect occurred at all – for example, no reflection in the mirror; or seeing grey swirling mist instead. When passing through the mirror, an ‘expected’ result would include an ability to move through the mirror and finding oneself in a different setting. ‘Unexpected’ results included moving through the mirror, but finding oneself in a “world of cartoon-like images”; whilst ‘no result’ meant that the subject found the mirror to be solid and unyielding, not allowing them to pass through to another setting on the other side. The results revealed that using a switch and willing a light to come on were both found to be equally easy by subjects. There was a greater amount of ‘no result’ in the task requiring the subject to will the light to come on, but this was not statistically significant overall. 

The data showed that it may be easier to will a light to turn off rather than on, although LaBerge and Levitan suggest that this conclusion may be premature, as prior to willing the light off, the subject had been able to successfully will it to turn on and stated that there may be a condition in which if you can turn a light on in a dream, you can also successfully turn it off. Subjects also had no problem in performing a simple task such as looking at their reflection in a mirror, although it was likely that the dreamer would perceive an altered appearance (as opposed to their waking appearance). This occurred in 41% of the subjects. In 12 cases (28%) the subject’s image transformed as they watched in the mirror. It was reasonable to expect that passing through the mirror to another setting would be the task which subjects found to be the most difficult. 

However, almost half of the subjects were able to do so, and 86% of subjects were able to pass through the mirror at least once, even if they did not experience a new dream setting on the other side. An example of an ‘expected’ result for this task was found in the report of one subject who imagined the mirror to be like water so that they were able to easily slide through. When fully through the water, they rose to the surface to find themselves in a bright, sunlit backyard swimming pool with a roof shelter.

The lack of large differences in the ease of accomplishment of the various tasks in this experiment is interesting. Lucid dreamers are able to exert a large amount of control over their dream experiences, although it is far from perfect. Most notable in the results was the lack of reluctance in the mirror images to show normal reflections and in some cases, the occurrence of fascinating instability of the image. Self-image is an incredibly psychologically-loaded concept – with complex internal representations, which the authors suggest may be responsible for the differences in waking and dream perception of the subjects during the mirror task. The instability points to the most prominent difference between waking and dream perception – because dreams change and may be in a constant state of flux. Dreamers can exploit this in lucid dream induction, by examining written phrases repeatedly and watching for changes to occur. 

An interesting question is whether perceptual instability results from the lack of anchoring sensory input from the physical senses or from a brain-state which is peculiar to REM sleep patterns (when dreaming occurs). Marquis d’Hervey de Saint-Denys and Alan Worsley observed something which they referred to as the ‘light switch phenomenon’ – the inability to change the illumination of a room on demand. LaBerge and Levitan’s study shows that sometimes this phenomenon is present and sometimes it is not. Some subjects who were able to turn on the light reported no concurrent change in general illumination whilst others reported a significant increase in brightness. 

A key target for research would be to discover what the brain is doing in both circumstances. Further, although the passing through a mirror to a new setting task should be the most difficult – and in some cases, impossible for certain subjects, a separate study published in Omni (April, 1987) reported that 51 subjects attempted to arrive at a particular pre-determined target by spinning in a dream. 18 (35%) succeeded in arriving at their target, therefore showing that it is not only possible to create a new scene in a dream, but also to create one which is specifically desired. It is the view of Tibetan Buddhists that all dream images are transmutable and this experiment provides support for this theory. If a dreamer is able to control the stability of dream imagery; create lasting dream-scenes/objects and exert an influence over the dream environment, it may be possible to achieve a state of virtual reality, almost without limit.

Dreams 100 - 162

I haven't been able to update my Dream Diary recently, due to moving home (I am now living at my nan's address, temporarily) and not having computer/internet access. That doesn't mean that I stopped keeping a Dream Diary, however, simply that I could not put it online for my readers. Now I have a laptop and last night I spend hours trying up my handwritten notes so I could post my last few months worth of dreams here for you to enjoy in bulk! From now on, I should be able to make regular posts as usual and continue with my other articles and dream research posts.

Dream 100
Dream date: 1 December 2012
I was in the Student Union bar, standing by the bar with EB. He was showing me some photographs of him and his brother, on holiday. The photographs were close-up shots of them hand-gliding, but you could not see their faces, just portions of their bodies. He told me that a girl had recently given birth, but he was not sure if he or his brother were the father as they had both had sex with her. I then stepped to the side and looked down the side of the bar, leading to the toilets (where there are a row of quiz machines). I saw a pair of shapely, naked legs – female – but that was all. I was aware that it was PS’s new girlfriend.

Dream 101
Dream date: 5 December 2012
I was at my nan’s house. I was in a limousine, outside the house and it was bright daylight. I was aware that a girl from my former high school, SR was dating EB. I felt annoyed that I had not realised this sooner. SR was in the back of the limo with me, smirking. EB left my nan’s house via the front door and also got into the vehicle.

Dream 102
Dream date: 12 December 2012
I was in Sheringham, near the train station. The weather was hot and sunny and the road seemed wider than normal, filled with people. EB was employing me and his ex-girlfriend to pick up rubbish and put it in wheelbarrows. I was doing all the work, and his ex was just sitting on a deckchair, watching. She was petite, with blonde hair and a large white hair clip in the side. I saw a close-up of her face. The scene changed, and it was night, with very little illumination from streetlights – as this particular scene would be like in real-life - EB and I were walking up Common Lane. By the gap in the bushes which leads to the newt pond, a slithering monster crawled out onto the road. It was a decapitated old snake woman. I started shouting at EB “fuck her, fuck her” and he had sex with the monster, from behind. The scene changed again. I was in a large family home, which was brightly lit. The family was not my own – and I did not recognise them from real-life, but I close to them in the dream. We were sitting in the kitchen. There was a black male, dressed in a blue T-shirt and jeans. I was told by the family that this male would soon be leaving for good and I felt disappointed by this. I wished the situation could change. I then found I was weighing myself on a set of scales as the black male got ready to leave.

Dream 103
Dream date: 16 December 2012
I was in my nan’s house. I became aware that I was dreaming – i.e. lucid. I was in my bedroom. I walked down the stairs. AM, who I lived with at university was there, at the bottom of the stairs, near the front door. She told me to open the front door. I did and there was a person dressed as a green frog standing to the side of the door step. I then thought (lucidly) that I would like to meet Marilyn Monroe. I opened the door to the living-room, hoping to find her, but instead EB was there. He was ignoring me. I closed the door and went out into the front garden. There was some form of canvas tent – very small and narrow. A procession of dancers were can-canning around the house and AM was there again. It was night-time and I could see millions of very bright stars in the sky.

Dream 104
Dream date: 20 December 2012
I was in a canteen. CDV was there, seated. There was a long counter full of different types of food and lots of long tables where many people were sitting eating. To one side of the buffet counter, there was a hideous monster – like a swamp monster, green and slimy and crawling on it’s belly. I ignored it and looked at the food – one of the dishes was fish curry. I was then outside and could see a large gravel pit – it was bright sunlight.

Dream 105
Dream date: 27 December 2012
I was with my family – my mum, nan, aunt (CJ) and some of my cousins were there. I noticed the typical New York style street signs and realised that this was where we were. It was bright sunlight and very hot. My family crossed a street and shouted at me to hurry up and follow them, as I was still on the other side of the road. I caught up with them and we walked to a second-hand bookshop. Outside the shop were many crates of books. I saw a box of posh cosmetics – it was filled with rows of tiny glass bottles of skincare lotions. I noticed that a couple of the bottles were missing. The item was priced at $22 and I was trying to decide if it was worth buying it.

Dream 106
Dream date: 3 January 2013
I was in the living-room at my nan’s house. I was seated on the floor, beside the sofa. My nan was saying racist things and I was telling her to stop as I am mixed-race myself and becoming offended. On the television was a circus performance – lots of people dressed entirely in red were performing a dance routine with balloons. I then saw this scene close up, as if I was present in the audience.

Dream 107
Dream date: 7 January 2013
I was in a hospital with a small boy (around 6 years old, brown hair and freckles), who was unwell. It was a chest complaint. I knelt down beside him and told him that he was going to soon be seeing a doctor who would make him better. I was aware that there was a wedding ‘groom’ present, and myself and the little boy (who was apparently my son) were expected to attend a wedding, although I wasn’t sure who the bride was. The little boy (my son), pointed at several posters mounted high on the walls. They were of naked pregnant women with over-sized erect penises. He asked what the pictures were of, but I was confused myself. There was a stand nearby, filled with condoms and other contraceptives.

Dream 108
Dream date: 14 January 2013
I was in my nan’s living-room, standing beside the armchair, in which PS was seated. He told me he was dating someone and I tried to guess who it was. I asked if it was someone called “Super” and he confirmed that it was and that her real name was “Jo”. I felt annoyed by this and told him that he had obviously fancied her throughout our own relationship. He confirmed that this was true. I was then in a bar, which was long and spacious. It was daytime and I could see the sun coming in through large, wall-to-wall windows. The bar was packed with army soldiers. It was my duty to find a particular soldier who had ‘gone AWOL’. I saw him brawling with another soldier on the floor of the bar. I was then aware that this was a form of ‘army training’ and I was supposed to be supervising.

Dream 109
Dream date: 16 January 2013
I was at Art School. I was logged onto my Facebook on a large computer screen, mounted on a wall. I was sitting on the edge of a bed. There were other people milling around the large room, which was quite dark and part of the school we were attending. There were people behind me, but I wasn’t sure who they were, although they were friends or acquaintances. I was sipping on an alcoholic drink while I was browsing Facebook. I told the people behind me that I would find an amazing song by the rap group Onyx. However, as much as I searched the internet, I could only find the instrumental version, although I could watch the video of the track also. I was getting frustrated as I wanted to listen and show the people the complete song. There was a strong smell of garlic.

Dream 110
Dream date: 24 January 2013
I was in the hallway at the bottom of the stairs in my nan’s house. I was laying with HC and LT – girls from my former school. We were all naked and suddenly we were having lesbian sex. It was quite a graphic experience and I was looking at their backs a lot – HC had a large blue tattoo on the base of her spine. We were all enjoying the experience. I was then dressed again and running to catch a train. I met a black male on the train platform and he showed me his artwork. He was HC’s boyfriend and he told me he knew I had performed lesbian sex acts on her, although he was not angry about it.

Dream 111
Dream date: 26 January 2013
I was trying to call my former friend EC on a mobile phone. I was in a church with stained glass windows. On one of the wooden pews, there was a plate of potato wedges. I looked up and one of the stained glass windows was inscribed with the words “Deadnet 31”. I wondered what it meant. I then found myself in my nan’s living-room. A woman, who was a family friend (although unknown to me in real-life) was seated on the sofa (which was long and against a wall with a window behind – not like my nan’s living-room in real-life), surrounded by various real-life family members. She seemed like a huge, spongy mass of fat pink flesh. I sat on the sofa – and looked closely at her – she was to my left-hand side. She was called “Tumour Woman” and I was aware that she was suffering from cancer. I was then in a pub by the seaside and it was made entirely of glass. The sun was shining outside. There was a blonde woman serving and I asked form toast and a set of keys which were given to me. I was then outside the pub, looking up a hill – also by the sea. Some skateboarders skated down the hill past me. I saw that there was a cabinet full of sandwiches nearby – outside. I looked into the cabinet. I was then back at my nan’s house. I was in the ‘front room’ with my mum, trying on a pink dress. I walked through to the living-room (which now resembled the real-life layout of the room) and my granddad (now dead in real-life and not living in this property since my early childhood in any event) was seated on the sofa. He did not seem to notice me, it was like he was in a trance. My cousin HM was in the room also and I hugged her.

Dream 112
Dream date: 3 February 2013
I was in an outside courtyard in the hot sun. There was a goat/donkey creature – although I could not tell exactly what breed of animal it was – tethered to a wooden wall. A dog was barking loudly nearby and it was scaring the goat/donkey creature. The dog was then seen in close-up biting a human leg, although I am not sure who the leg belonged to. I went into a kitchen – it was PS’s house in London. On the counter was a bag of Milk Roll bread. I threw it in the bin and felt pleased with myself.

Dream 113
Dream date: 7 February 2013
I was in the back of a car, driven by either EB or his brother – both were in the front of the car. We were driving through a sandy valley, although I was aware that we were in Britain, not a foreign country. I was worried that I wasn’t going able to get home. We went to a diner – it was very open with only three walls, which were navy blue. The tables were positioned haphazardly. There was some form of police operation happening. I was aware that this was my university. I experienced being both in the diner and standing outside, looking in through what were now, huge glass windows. It seemed as though the building was constantly changing. It was built behind what used to be the “Teen & Twenty” Youth Club in Sheringham, where the old skateboard ramp used to be. I was supposedly working a shift there, although I wasn’t doing much work. There was another female and male working also – wearing white aprons. I sat down with the police (two male officers in uniform) and ‘a criminal couple’ – I was aware that they had committed crimes, but wasn’t sure if the two police officers at the table were also aware of this fact. We were all drinking and eating snack and the two police officers were conversing with me in a friendly way.

Dream 114
Dream date: 8 February 2013
I was standing on a sea-side promenade with my mum. It was a large promenade, with lots of typical sea-side tourist attractions – ice cream shops, fairground rides, stalls etc. The sea wall was just higher than waist-height and bent round at strange angles and looking down, we could see the beach, which was crowded with people. The weather was grey and overcast. A male who appeared to be a composite character (of EB/PP) was present and he seemed to be unwilling to spend time with me, leaving me feeling disappointed. However, he remained close by my mum and I. My mum and I had a drink of Jack Daniels and Coke while looking down over the sea-wall. We balanced our drinks on the wall. On the promenade there was a goose and a group of Turkish men.

Dream 115
Dream date: 10 February 2013
I was in a kitchen with my mum (the room was unknown to me in real-life, but it appeared to be the open-plan lounge and kitchen in a large flat. We were seated at a counter. I was aware that we did not actually live there). I was online shopping, using a laptop. I was talking to my mum, who was reading catalogues/brochures. Someone entered the room via a door to the right-hand side of the room, in the corner. I was not sure who this person was. I then found myself in a phone box in Sheringham town centre – it was outside the art gallery/framers (there is no phone box there in real-life). I had a makeup bag, filled with makeup brushes, which I was fiddling with, while using the payphone. I broke one of the brushes. They didn’t belong to me, but I decided I would keep them. I was calling a girl – I am not sure who it was – but the conversation seemed both mundane and uneasy. I was dressed only in a green bath towel, wrapped around me and felt exposed. I was then on a strange council estate. I was walking out of a door, at pavement level, into the square. I could see that there were huge square tower-blocks, forming a quadrant. Lots of people were on the balconies and in the concrete square below. I walked up some stairs onto one of the balconies – high up – at least the third floor. I was watching the other residents of the estate, who seemed to be in a good mood and conversing with each other/having fun. I was aware that I lived on this council estate. I saw EB coming out of one of the doorways, in the block adjacent to the one where I was positioned. He looked across and saw me, and started approaching, along a walkway. I felt embarrassed that he would think I was ‘common’ or too working-class if he knew I lived here and imagined that he must be thinking negatively about me, especially as I was still wearing the towel and barefoot.

Dream 116
Dream date: 15 February 2013
I was on the road where my nan’s house is located. I left the house and started walking up the road, in the direction away from town. This area appeared to be very similar to how it looks in real-life. It was daytime and I realised that I was being followed. I felt a sense of danger and threat. I didn’t want to look behind me, and I started walking faster. Suddenly, from nowhere, EB appeared (I firstly thought the person running towards me was my follower, but when he grabbed my arm, I was pleased to see it was EB and felt safe). He came to my rescue – we both managed to run away from whoever it was following me and EB told me he would kill the person if they came close enough to attack. We went back down the road and entered my nan’s house – it was still daytime at this point. We were there, inside the house for a short while and then decided to go out again. We walked down the road, this time in the opposite direction as before – towards town. We were apprehended by a group of strange-looking (very short and squat, seemingly simple-minded) young people, dressed in casual clothing, such as baggy jeans and tracksuits and Nike trainers. There were about six of them, both male and female, although they all seemed to be quite boyish in appearance and were all unattractive. I thought that the person who had been following me belonged to this group and I felt uneasy. The group were acting oddly, wanting to talk to us. This happened near the gate to the ‘woods path’ – the path which runs alongside the forest, on the side of the road opposite the houses on my nan’s estate. One of the group told EB and I that he had some cannabis that he wanted to share with us and we agreed to go with them. About 50 yards away (in the exact location that the EB ‘fucked’ the old decapitated snake woman in the dream dated 12 December 2012, in the opening leading to the newt pond), there was a flimsy structure set up – like a two-sided tent made of white material, which was tall enough to stand up in, but only wide enough for two or three people to stand beside each other. We went into the tent. One of the short, simple-minded males grabbed my shoes (which were Nike trainers – which it appeared we were all wearing, although I had not been aware of the style of my own shoes up until this point) and pulled them off my feet. Another member of the group was talking to EB. We all started smoking cannabis. I felt annoyed about the loss of my shoes. I looked around the crowded tent structure and saw that there were lots of shoes lying around. It took ages for me to find my own shoes, but I eventually did, and put them back on. The atmosphere was still slightly threatening, although I wasn’t sure why. There was some conversation which I could not recall. I then suddenly had to punch one of the male group members in the face. EB and I then hurried away, back up the road towards my nan’s house.

Dream 117
Dream date: 16 February 2013
I was on a road outside a school, with a girl named Anna W (not known to me in real-life) and PF, a girl I lived with at university. We were waiting for a bus. When the bus approached, we all got on. I was standing up, holding onto one of the poles, by the front of the bus. Marilyn Monroe was also on the bus, standing beside me. She looked very unwell and was taking lots of pills. I thought the people on the bus – who were all seated, were talking about me. We drove to the sea-side. When PF got off the bus, she was using a wheelchair.

Dream 118
Dream date: 21 February 2013
I was seated at the table in my nan’s living-room. It was a hot sunny day and I felt calm and happy. I was trying to memorise lists from a selection of very boring magazines, which were about colour samples. I was writing long hand-written reviews of the colours as well as trying to memorise these lists. I was then getting ready to attend a party at Garden Road, Sheringham with EB. We were walking down this road, in the sun, looking at lots of beautiful, brightly coloured flowers.

Dream 119
Dream date: 22 February 2013
I was seated on a bar stool, by the window, in the Lobster pub in Sheringham. I was aware that I was supposed to be organising a hotel to stay in, but instead I was trying to find a chocolate mousse recipe (for my mum) on a Kindle. I then joined my family at a carvery restaurant and saw that there was a tray of prawns in breadcrumb.

Dream 120
Dream date: 2 March 2013
It was night and I was in a strange open-fronted supermarket. I was aware that I was supposed to be replacing some food (I am not sure for whom, but it appeared that I had taken/destroyed this person’s food). The supermarket had lots of brightly-lit shelves, but there was only two sandwiches and an orange-flavoured yoghurt. I was briefly in my nan’s living-room, then in another house – in a large airy, but old-fashioned lounge, with floral chairs. Barack and Michelle Obama where there, holding some form of ceremony/reception, but it was very casual. I was sat on the floor, while the President and his wife were seated on the floral chairs. Myself and some other persons present were being given gifts by the Obamas. One of the gifts was a teddy bear. Myself and a brunette female discovered that everyone had received £350 with their gifts, but we hadn’t got our money. We were disappointed and were discussing this loss of the money. I then realised I did in fact have my £350, but decided not to tell the other girl about my discovery. I became lucid and was having a conversation with PS. I started arguing with him about real-life issues concerning our relationship and my move to Norfolk. I then lost lucidity very quickly, and found that I was walking with EB, up the road, under the railway bridge. It was bright daylight. EB was topless, and talking to me about a baby called “Garry”. EB’s nipples looked very strange – they were huge and black. Suddenly, his nipples became an object he was holding in both hands – it looked like a large lump of coal, which had been cut in half. Inside was a glittering gold interior. He started drinking from it. I told him the coal-like/gold object belonged to Baby Garry. He said “no, it’s my nipples”.

Dream 121
Dream date: 4 March 2013
I was at my nan’s house, trying to keep the living-room door shut, by pushing against it with all my weight. There was a sense of dread and threat. It was night-time, but all the lights in the house were on. I had some form of drink in my hands (I am not sure how I could hold the door and have the drink in my hands, but I did). The drink looked like a bottle of whisky. I drank from it and suddenly developed huge muscles. I opened the living-room door and saw there was a huge, aggressive-looking male behind it, in the living-room. He was an enemy and I wrestled with him for a short while, managing to knock him unconscious. He laid on the floor, very still and I was anxious that I had actually murdered him. I went back into the hall in a panic. An unfamiliar male walked down the stairs and told me not to worry about killing my enemy – I would not be charged with murder. I felt relieved. I was then on a school-trip and my nan was present. We were in some kind of dark warehouse/basement, with weird etchings on the wall. A tour guide was leading us around, in a single-file line, but suddenly, all the other students disappeared and the surroundings seemed to take an even more sinister tone. I left, leaving my nan behind. I was then at a house party or a gathering, in a small house. There were lots of young people there. I met LG – a girl who went to my university, although it seemed as if I was meeting her for the first time. She was covered in tattoos. Another guest at the party told me that LG lived with EB’s family and I was surprised. I walked over to a kitchen counter and found a greetings card, the front of which was inscribed with the words “yellow sugar mother”.

Dream 122
Dream date: 6 March 2013
I woke up – it was a false awakening. I was in my bedroom at my nan’s house. As I glanced around my room, I noticed that there were lots of square boxes – very colourful and decorative – mounted high up on the wall, near the ceiling, and this triggered lucidity. I could hear a lot of noise from outside my window. I looked down, at the front garden and saw a group of girls leaving the house via the front door. There was one young brunette girl, pushing a pram, who was extremely noisy, shouting at the other girls. I went down, and outside, and found myself walking in a beautiful grassy meadow, which I did not recognise as being in Sheringham. There was a road nearby, and everything seemed very calm and tranquil now. I tried to call EB on my mobile (a lucid choice as I wanted to tell him he was in my dream, and summon him in person to test my powers of dream control). However EB was mumbling and I had to tell him to speak clearly, which he wouldn’t. I became frustrated and hung up on him. I came across AB (a former school friend) and her mother SB, also walking in the meadow. SB started telling me about a nightmare she had had, but I wasn’t listening properly, as I wanted to continue this lucid dream on my own terms and felt they were distracting me. I saw a huge billboard, on which there was an image of a huge blue gemstone (AB’s father used to collect rocks and minerals in real-life). I came across a bin and started looking inside it. In a Sainsbury’s carrier bag, there was a gun – at first I thought it was a revolver, but soon discovered it was just a pistol. I rang EB again, to tell him about the gun. I sat down on the grassy hill at the side of the meadow and willed EB to appear in person, but he simply remained on the other end of the phone. We talked about the character Max Branning from Eastenders. I then walked back to my nan’s house – I discovered that EB was locked in the coal shed. I let him out and told him that we should go and fire the gun in the woods, opposite the house. He was worried about leaving fingerprints on it and getting arrested, but I assured him this would not be a problem. I woke up.

Dream 123
Dream date: 8 March 2013
It was the Ice Age. I was outside a shed, and I opened the door. Inside was a half man/half leopard creature, which slightly scared me. I was on top of a platform looking down at the Ice Age world below me. The leopard-man appeared to be harmless. He was confined to a small wooden area and was not aggressive.

Dream 124
Dream date: 11 March 2013
I was in a very rustic-looking house, lying on a sofa. There were lots of flowers either hung, or growing, from the walls. An unfamiliar male entered the room. He accused me of stealing some photographs and I knew I was guilty, but did not admit it. He forced me to leave. I went outside and found that I was now outside a busy pub/tavern – it was night-time. I entered into some kind of vague conversation with the customers through the window. It transpired that they were going back to the male’s house after finishing their drinks. I went back with them, and again lay on the sofa. The unfamiliar male did not recognise me this time, and allowed me to remain lying there, relaxed.

Dream 125
Dream date: 12 March 2013
I was watching a scene as a spectator, but did not feel part of the action. Tulisa (NDubz/X Factor) was wearing a white dress and standing by a huge outdoor stage at what appeared to be a bust festival ground, which was being readied for a concert. The weather was warm, but not sunny. There was a young brunette girl with her and I was aware that this girl had been sexually abused. Tulisa was responsible for this girl, but was being bossy and distant. I then became part of the action – as if I were present. I was in my nan’s bathroom, which appeared similar to real-life, although there was a greater distance between the sink and the bath, and some form of counter was at the bottom of the bath, which I was leaning on. My university supervisor IE was running a bath. He said to me: “Baby, knight, corpse – what does it mean?” I replied: “Life force”. IE said: “I should not have asked a beautiful woman” and looked sad. I went downstairs and sat in an armchair in the living-room. My cousin HM was in there. She stood beside me and started boasting about something. She opened her mouth and all her teeth were rotten and decaying. We had a fight and I came out victorious.

Dream 126
Dream date: 13 March 2013
I was in someone’s house. Walking through into a navy-walled room, I saw a young boy (about 10 – 12 years old) seated at a desk, with his back to me. There was a tap (water faucet) mounted on the wall of the room, but there was no sink/basin below it. An older man (unseen) shouted from the next room (the one I had left before entering the navy room where the boy was sitting): “he’s gay!” I wanted to use the tap, but you needed to know a pin number to make the water come out. I was asking the boy for the pin number, but he would not answer me. I looked at the wall above his desk (which was positioned against the wall) and saw there were lots of pins sticking out of the wall. His mum entered the room (she came from around a corner and it seemed to take ages from me seeing her turn into the room for her to actually reach us) and started to verbally abuse the boy, telling him he should be more masculine and that an older man lived next-door who would help him become a ‘real man’. She told him he was dirty and needed to shower. I was then at my nan’s house. She became violent, trying to beat me and I felt scared. I thought I should run next-door where the ‘older man’ lived, to seek help. I was getting punched hard in the face and was begging for my nan to stop. I then realised this was all just a game. The atmosphere changed and EB was present – he, my nan and I were sitting in the lounge, calmly watching a film. My nan said to EB: “this is the one we say is Bette Davis!” I then was in another scene – a house party which was held at a property apparently belonging to my friend, CD. He was using his mobile and told me he was texting ‘Debbie Reynolds’. I asked if ‘Debbie Reynolds’ was actually ‘Kelly Henderson’ and he said yes, they were the same person. There were lots of balloons, floating up from the floor to the ceiling, and everyone at the party seemed to be having lots of fun. I walked over to a computer, where I was logged into my Facebook account. The word “LOVE” was written in massive letters somewhere on my timeline, which I assumed was a message from someone (unknown) intended for me. I felt happy.

Dream 127
Dream date: 14 March 2013
I was in a dimly lit room with EB and tennis champions, Serena and Venus Williams. They were very skinny and dressed in white lycra cycling shorts, cropped vests and trainers. I was aware that EB was employed as their chauffer. Venus got onto an exercise bike and started peddling. The scene changed, although I cannot recall the location. My mum was telling me that I had to do some laundry. She and a friend from London, CDV, were going to visit a hospital. With them was an Asian-looking young male. The words “aged oil” were spoken by someone. The Asian male put on a white coat, which had been on a nearby table and I discovered that we had been standing in an unfamiliar pub/bar. My mum said: “the bees are stronger now”. I recall the words: “Machiavellian Pinch”. I am not sure who said them, or if I saw them written somewhere. My mum told me that she would be returning from the hospital at 2.40 pm and said: “remember to shower!” I was then in a hotel room (I cannot recall many details about this room, except it was decorated white and I was standing beside the window, which had filmy white curtains) with another, unidentified woman – middle-aged and non-descript. She handed me a rectangular box upon which was inscribed “Michael Washing Powder”. I knew I had won £5 on the lottery, the ticket was in my pocket. The scene changed again and I was back in the pub/bar, where my mum was working. A male from my hometown, DW was present, laughing and having fun. The table where he was seated was called “Bus Rank”.

Dream 128
Dream date: 15 March 2013
I was in a betting shop, standing beside a row of fruit machines. On the floor was a pile of clothes which were stained with milk and coffee. This pile of clothes was available for free, but I did not want them. Containers of milk and coffee were also stood on the counter. Next, myself and AP – a former school friend were driving in a car (down Sheringham High Street, which now was much bigger and more urban in appearance, with wider roads and taller buildings), and were passed on the left-hand side by another school friend, MS - on a motorbike. This occurred in the location where the town clock is positioned. He was wearing a grey cardigan (but no helmet) and he greeted us, happily. It was bright sunny day. I was then back in the betting shop and saw that MS was gambling on one of the fruit machines. The pile of clothes was still on the floor. I was then back in the car with AP again, and MS passed us on the motorbike a second time – almost an exact repetition of the previous dream scene.

Dream 129
Dream date: 17 March 2013
It was bright daylight. I was with my mum, standing in an unfamiliar outside location, near some houses. My mum was pushing a baby’s pram, in which there was an unfamiliar baby. She told me that we were going to pick up my younger cousin, JC, from school. We started walking, and passed under a dark underpass (like Camden Lock), beside a canal. I suddenly became lucid – i.e. aware that this was a dream. I tried to force EB to come into the dream. Suddenly there was a huge splash as something fell into the canal beside us – as though dropping down from the ceiling of the underpass/the sky. The spraying water made us wet, I asked my mum who had fallen into the canal and she told me it was EB. I tried to imagine that he was safe and alive, not drowned. He climbed out of the canal, naked and I lay down on the concrete ground beside the canal and let him have sex with me, although I did not need to take my clothes off.

Dream 130
Dream date: 18 March 2013
I had a false awakening. I saw my duvet cover (I recognised the flower pattern) was over my head and I could not pull it down at first, it appeared to be stuck. I succeeded and last and then I was aware that I was still asleep and dreaming, as the painted walls in my bedroom now were decorated with huge polka dots which are not there in real-life (the real walls are simply pale pink). I saw EB standing beside my window, looking out into the front garden. He was naked from the waist down. I told him to come over and have sex with me. It took many attempts to summon him over, as he was initially ignoring me, and my voice was quite weak and whispery (I could not force it out, as sometimes happens in lucid dreams). I discovered that I was wearing a pair of denim shorts. EB tried to have sex with me, pulling the denim shorts to one side, but they were too tight and it wasn’t working. We were then in a pub interior. It looked a little like The Lobster, in Sheringham. However, it was very dark and looked like it was in the process of being refurbished – there was dust and boxes everywhere. There were couple of other customers in the pub, but no-one I could recognise. EB started talking to a male, seated on a barstool by the window. Suddenly I noticed that the pub as filled with thousands of butterflies floating in the air above my head. I put my hand to my stomach and discovered that I was pregnant – I was gaining more and more weight by the second and I began to feel anxious. I tried to take control of the dream, but I was unable to do anything other than tell EB that we should leave the pub. Walking outside, we noticed that there were lots and lots of exotic birds and butterflies filling the sky and settling down nearby.

Dream 131
Dream date: 20 March 2013
I was a spectator in this dream and not part of the action. I was watching a scene which looked like an office or workplace – from a distance. There was a set of stairs, or an escalator – a corridor – and then another set of stairs. Many male figures, dressed in suits and carrying briefcases were walking robotically up one set of stairs, along the corridor and then down the stairs at the other end. They would then disappear from view for a moment, before repeating this activity. It was as though one side of the building was cut away so that I could watch this. I was then looking into a lift, where there was a group of similar businessmen. I was aware that one of the males was getting bullied in the workplace. He was being ostracised by the other males. I saw a sign in the lift, which informed me that these men were advertising executives. I had a very long piece of paper in front of me also – as if it was laid out on a desk or some other surface, although I was not actually aware of my surroundings, it was all whiteness and quite forgettable. The paper had writing on it, informing me that there was to be some form of trial determined by a “robot jury”. I was then back, watching the businessmen climb and descend the stairs repeatedly.

Dream 132
Dream date: 21 March 2013
I was in a bookshop of some sort. I did not actually recognise the bookshop, but it was similar to a Waterstones store. I was standing by a counter, with some other persons who appeared to be my acquaintances in the dream. They were talking about exams. I walked over to a bookshelf with one other person. I pulled a book down from the shelf and opened it on a random page. There was a picture of a hideous monster there. I walked around the store for a while, then sat at a wooden table, where my mum was opposite. I realised that I had failed my A level exams and told her it was her fault as she had told me to do the wrong subjects (in real-life I passed all my exams and chose my own subjects).

Dream 133
Dream date: 22 March 2013
I was seated at a desk opposite a woman who I knew to be a ‘Crown Prosecution Service Executive’ (whatever an ‘executive’ means in this context). She was showing me her bright green manicure. I then saw that this unfamiliar woman changed into VW, a girl I knew from school. Her lips were very fat and her mouth was open. She was wearing green lipstick. I got up from the desk and walked over to a stand where there was a display of fancy cosmetics. I saw one palette of eyeshadows and focused on this in particular. The price of this item was £69. The room was quite dark, with subtle lighting.

Dream 134
Dream date: 24 March 2013
I woke up – a false awakening, although I did not become lucid. There was a pair of men’s boxer shorts covering my face and I struggled to get them off. They had the same floral pattern as my real-life duvet cover. I noticed that there were many butterflies – large and perhaps inanimate, or simply dead, mounted on the wall opposite my bed. I went downstairs. My nan was in the living-room with my friend HW. They were talking to one another, but ignoring me. I stood in the hallway, trying to telephone the National Rail Line to find out the departure times of a train, but I kept misdialling. I made many attempts, but every time I failed to get through. My nan and HW were laughing at me, and I was getting frustrated. I kept dialling the wrong number.

Dream 135
Dream date: 25 March 2013
I was in my nan’s living-room, sitting on an armchair. In another armchair in the opposite corner of the room (which appeared as it does in real-life), EP, EB’s friend who I have become acquainted with in real-life, was sitting, eating green grapes. My nan was in the kitchen and the atmosphere was friendly, we were all chatting. EP said he had to visit the “Circuit Shop” which was apparently just up the road. He said he would return soon. He got up to leave and showed me his remaining grapes, in a plastic box. I went out into the front garden – it was bright and sunny. SJS, a girl I know, and a group of other unfamiliar people were on the front garden, on motorbikes. There was a heated argument going on. I said to SJS “I could destroy you”. This referred to a real-life incident (a secret) which I was told about her. She left quickly, as did the other persons. I walked down the road and met my ex-boyfriend MT. We were chatting and having a nice time, just strolling along, passing the houses at the top of the estate. I got a text from EP, but I could not understand what the message said. I returned to my nan’s house. My friend NHN was there. We went upstairs to a bedroom which did not actually resemble any room in the real-life house. It was a bedroom. The walls were yellow and dripping with blood, which seemed to be coming out of the wallpaper. I telephoned EP on my mobile and begged him to return to the house to see the bleeding walls. He did. There was a wailing noise in the room as he returned – it was as though the bleeding walls were crying. I felt quite anxious. NHN and I wandered round this room and saw that there was a cabinet with lots of lilac ornaments lined up on it. EP had now become EB. My mum also entered the room and handed me a mirror. I saw a close-up image of the back of my teeth, which were rotten. My mum said: “don’t worry, it won‘t affect the front”.

Dream 136
Dream date: 26 March 2013
I was in a dimly lit interior scene – an unfamiliar house. I saw a friend from London, DS, seated on a brown sofa. I asked “where’s PS?” DS then became JH, PS’s sister and I realised I had mistaken her identity. She seemed unwilling to answer me. CJS was also present in the room, but was saying nothing. I started opening cupboards which were at floor level. In one was a large amount of cannabis. I was then showing TS (PS’s other sister) my mobile. It looked like a small notebook instead of a phone. She broke it when I handed it to her, but said she could fix it for me. She did something to it, and when she handed it back, it was skinned sausage meat and useless – i.e. sausage meat which has been removed from the casing. I said: “now it will go mouldy”. There was a wedding taking place in the next room and the unfamiliar bridal party were dressed in lilac.

Dream 137 
Dream date: 27 March 2013
I was on a boat at sea. There were loads of beautiful rainbows in the sky and I was in awe. However, the sky was dark and it was night-time. Suddenly, it turned from night to day – bright sunlight. I was on holiday with SS, a man I do not know very well, who lives in my hometown. I was then in the town centre, which was filled with deep sea water. I was seated on some form of metal platform, which I thought was dangerous, but then realised was much bigger and safer that I had first imagined. SS told me that we would go back to our hotel for a cheese and onion sandwich, but before this he would have to compete in a contest (I am not sure what type of contest this was). I thought that SS would want to have sex with me in the hotel. I watched the contest, which was taking place between SS and some other men, some feet away on a separate metal platform. We were situated beside the town clock, quite high up from the water level, on these metal platforms. The contest seemed to entail the men throwing and catching a ball and turning round repetitively. There were other spectators cheering them on. LON, a male I formerly knew as a teenager (a geek, and several years older than myself, who I used to tease in a friendly way and play pranks on) walked past and smirked at me. I was then in the Two Lifeboats pub with my mum, telling her about the previous events (the boat; the rainbows; the contest). I saw a white jacket hanging on the back of a chair. My mum and I were drinking clear drinks.

Dream 138
Dream date: 28 March 2013
It was night-time and I was in the Crown pub – the whole town seemed to be there as well. We were all standing or seated in a circle, waiting for some form of entertainment to start. I left and walked across the road to the Two Lifeboats. There was a similarly large crowd in there also, in a party mood. Walking out of the back exit of the pub, I saw that there was a tent erected. I crawled into the tent, which was huge on the inside – like a Tardis. The interior of the tent was comprised of very many pastel-coloured rooms, all inter-linked. There were windows, with a view of the outside, or of the adjoining rooms. I was walking from room to room, but getting lost as it was very maze-like. I eventually found my way out of the pastel-coloured tent-maze and walked back over to the Crown. Everyone was still positioned in the circle. The Stone Roses were in the middle, performing a set, which was called “Vinyl” – that was the name of the concert. After the performance, all the people in the audience went outside, where it was a bright sunny day. We were walking along the promenade, which was crowded with tourists, many of whom were walking dogs. The road looked much wider than usual. Looking out to sea, I could see decorative sail boats and beautiful, brightly-coloured structures in the ocean, which I could not recognise. The structures were either statues or fairground rides or suchlike. I went off to have sex with PP who I ran up with whilst staring out to sea.

Dream 139
Dream date: 29 March 2013
I was in a room with some former friends from my sixth form college. They were seated at a long desk. I was at first standing by the doorway, but I then moved to the desk and took a seat. We were revising for A-level exams and I felt stressed, especially about History. Some unfamiliar, very short, chubby people (a group of about 5 – 6, all very similar looking) entered the room. Myself and a couple of other students looked under the desk at our bags, and noticed that theft of some of our belongings had taken place. I knew the short, chubby people who had invaded the room were responsible for taking our belongings, but was pleased to find that all my possessions were still safe in my bag. I started to become anxious about my History exam again, but then ‘remembered’ that I actually held two undergraduate and one postgraduate degrees, which meant that I must have already taken and passed my A levels some time ago. Some caterers, dressed in chef’s whites, entered the room with silver trays of food, which were laid out before myself and the other students on the desk. There was a party and I started to enjoy myself.

Dream 140
Dream date: 1 April 2013
I was in a Psychology class – being taught by my former A-level teacher. However, instead of a sixth form classroom, we were in a university lecture room. My mum was at the front of the class, assisting my tutor, and ignoring me. I was angry with her. CW was seated behind me, drawing complex diagrams. She received praise from the tutor, but I was unsure of what was going on and was confused by the assignment. My mum was mocking me about being stupid. I saw EB was seated on one of the chairs across the lecture room, wearing a blonde woman’s wig, taking notes from the tutor’s lesson.

Dream 141
Dream date: 2 April 2013
I was annoyed as EB was standing some distance from me, using my mobile to call his ex-girlfriend. Another female – vaguely familiar, but unidentified except for the fact she was apparently a relative of EB told me “he’s wrong to do that”. I found myself at the top of a spiral staircase looking down on this scene.

Dream 142
Dream date: 3 April 2013
I was in a café and there was some other customers in there. There was a conversation going on about my hair – but I cannot recall what was said exactly. I left the café (it was night-time) and went into a little dark shack, where there was a laptop on a bed. I became aware that the laptop belonged to HC, a girl from my high school. I stole the laptop, placing it in a backpack and ran away. HC was behind me and knew I had stolen her laptop. I saw EB up ahead of me and I shouted to him to help me as I was in trouble, but he was unwilling to do so.

Dream 143
Dream date: 4 April 2013
EB had dark hair (which he does not in real-life). He told me that he was going to a Jungle Night. We were standing at the bottom of a set of stairs, in an unfamiliar interior location. The Jungle Night was to celebrate some wedding – although I did not know whose wedding. EB asked if he could borrow my hairdryer, but in fact he meant my hair. He wanted to borrow my hair to attend the Jungle Night.

Dream 144
Dream date: 5 April 2013
EB was with a male dressed as a traditional sailor in white. I was holding a shiny purple drawstring bag which I really wanted to show them.

Dream 145
Dream date: 6 April 2013
I was in my nan’s living-room, during daytime. A girl from school, RR was present, standing behind the sofa. She asked to see my mobile, which was an i-Phone in the dream. When she handed it back to me, it was broken, with a huge crack in the screen. I was angry. RR said not to worry, she would claim the repairs on her insurance.

Dream 146
Dream date: 8 April 2013
I entered a room which was totally blue, and perfectly arranged. There were lots of soft toys around the edges of the room, and a male character seated at a desk. It appeared to be a scene from the computer game, Sims 3 – all pixelated. An unidentified male approached me from behind and showed me a mobile phone with a large screen, on which was playing a video of a man cutting out the eye of a person lying down. The video was a close-up of the scalpel slicing the skin around the eye. I was disgusted, but did not know how to make the video stop and I could not look away.

Dream 147
Dream date: 10 April 2013
I was in a scene which I knew to be part of the “Iraq War” – the first one which took place in the 1990s. I was being given lots of scraps of paper by soldiers in camouflage gear. I was dismayed to find that the floor was covered by a carpet on which glue had been spilled. I was dropping the scraps of paper, which were sticking to the gluey carpet at my feet. I walked into a library and felt confused. The librarian was a middle-aged male, but instead, I walked towards a group of students and asked “where are the social science journals?” One of the students – a male – pointed to a row of computers. I wandered over to the computers, where there was another group of students present. One was a Spanish male, in his twenties and casually dressed. Behind me was a wall-to-ceiling shelf of textbooks. I was suddenly in an office, separated from another office-like room by a transparent glass wall. Bright sunlight was streaming into both rooms, and we were high up, as if in a skyscraper. Behind the glass wall, was a businessman, dressed in a suit, seated at a desk. I accidentally kicked over a glass of orange squash which was placed in the middle of the floor. I could see several threatening-looking ‘henchmen’ approaching the businessman, via a door at the rear of his office space. It was my job to perform a dance for the businessman to watch through the glass. I felt exposed and used.

Dream 148
Dream date: 12 April 2013
I had a false awakening and became lucid. There was a re-occurrence of a dream-scene (see 24 March 2013), whereby a pair of boxer shorts (the same floral print as my duvet cover) were stuck on my face. I pulled them off after struggling for a moment. I walked downstairs, determined to find EB. I became aware that he had a new girlfriend. I was then walking down a spiral staircase, using a mobile phone, but could not work out who I was talking to. The staircase was white and the room I was in – not my real-life home – was bright and airy with lots of potted plants on the ground level. I felt as if I were about to wake up and began flapping my hands manically (a technique supposedly used by many lucid dreamers to maintain their lucid dream state). I felt myself returning to consciousness and woke up.

Dream 149
Dream date: 13 April 2013
I was in a large white marquee, during the day. Various members of the Eastenders cast – Phil Mitchell, Billy Mitchell, the Branning brothers, amongst others – were present, dressed in smart suits. I could not work out exactly what was going on – it was a complex plot from the soap, and I felt bored and confused by the action around me. I was then in Waitrose, SS – a vague acquaintance from my hometown, was behind me in the queue for the tills. He was sticking out his tongue and pulling strange faces. The cashier at the till was a young black male. The woman in front of me (middle-aged and fat) was complaining to him, telling him that she had sent 13 messages of complaint to the manager, which had all gone unanswered. She was shouting and being very rude. The cashier was saying “sorry, sorry” and this seemed to anger the woman. She began smashing up the store. I leaned over the grocery conveyer belt and told the male cashier that he must delete the 13 messages of complaint so that he would not get fired. I then thought that I should try to help him by deleting the messages myself and entered an office, where the answering machine (where the messages were stored) was located. This small white office was just to the side of the tills. I woke up before I could work out how to delete the messages.

Dream 150
Dream date: 16 April 2013
I was waiting in the open air at a bus stop. I did not recognise the surroundings, except for the fact it was daytime and I was in a suburban area, with houses and trees behind me. Other persons – known to me, but not recalled, were present. A girl was giving me makeup tips. A yellow bus approached. A second female – unknown to me in real-life, but in the dream she was someone I did actually know - dismounted the bus. She was young, but hunched over, like an old woman. She was dressed very scruffily. One of the group standing at the bus stop told me that this girl had become a drug addict – she was using heroin. As she approached me, she smiled in a very friendly way and I felt sorry for her. I knew that, underneath her clothing, her body was terribly scarred and deformed. She stuck out her tongue – it was very long, thin and grey – resembling both an over-sized worm and a piece of slimy, frayed rope, falling right down to her navel. I felt repulsed. I noticed EB was standing next to me. He said: “we need to learn the colour codes”. We got on the bus as the worm-tongued female hobbled away.

Dream 151
Dream date: 17 April 2013
I was in Upper Sheringham, although it looked a little different to real-life, which more houses and shops. It was bright and sunny and there were lots of green trees and hedges. I was with CJS and a group of other middle-aged women, driving around in a car. I was asking: “where did PS and LB go?” but CJS would not answer me. We got out of the car and went into a small café. The café sold makeup also, as well as souvenir items, on wire shelves. I was upset to find that I could not afford to buy the makeup. I sat down with CJS and the middle-aged women to eat a meal, although I cannot remember any further details.

Dream 152
Dream date: 18 April 2013
I was in a spacious, brightly-lit gym, playing a game on an arcade machine. I finished the game and walked over to a full-length mirror and saw that I was very fat – wearing a pink and white gym outfit made of lycra. I started crawling on the floor, towards a row of exercise machines (running machines). I saw my mum was training a group of people on the machines. I got on one of the machines and set the pace to a very high speed, so that it was incredibly difficult to keep up. I felt like I was going to fall off the back of the machine. At the rear of the gym, the Jeremy Kyle show was being filmed – the ‘studio’ area appeared as it does in the real-life show, with the live audience observing. I could see the stage from the left side. There was an unidentified young brunette woman (in casual clothing) seated on the stage, being interviewed by Jeremy Kyle. She said: “I’m here because my sister pees herself, she’s a retard”. The sister – also young and brunette, wearing a strange outdated dress and a white headband, came out onto the stage, from left. She was stumbling and ending up crawling across the stage, wailing and crying. One of the big male security guards, present at the back of the stage pulled her up so that she could sit on a chair beside her sister. Jeremy said: “so what’s your story?” The second sister was inconsolable and all floppy. She screamed in an anguished voice: “they tried to toilet my duct!” I walked away from the stage, back to the full-length mirror and noticed that I was back to my normal size and shape.

Dream 153
Dream date: 19 April 2013
The actual location of the dream-scene was vague or I simply cannot recall it. There was a Terminator, intent on slaughtering everyone in the vicinity. I was fearful and anxious. Someone (unidentified) called out from behind me: “you’d better dress for winter!” I was then suddenly kneeling on a white marble floor in a very airy, open room, at the foot of a wide spiral staircase. I was holding a lovely brown leather purse, which I was aware was a gift from SL. The purse had been damaged by cannabis, somehow – this part of the dream did not make sense – but I was unhappy about the ruined purse. Some unidentified young people descended the staircase. One of them – male, said he could fix my purse. He took some scissors from his jeans pocket and began cutting it. When he gave it back to me, it was now a diary and I was displeased. I then found myself in a supermarket queue, buying single mushrooms, which I was clutching in my hands. The cashier – a young male – was also somehow a customer. It transpired that this was a self-serve counter and the cashier was also shopping, rather than serving customers. I knew he was the cashier as he was wearing a uniform and name badge. He seemed angry at me, although I was not sure why. I saw a close-up of his nose, and he had one big nostril, no septum. I then found myself standing on the marble-floored room at the bottom of the spiral staircase with the group of persons who had descended the stairs earlier (including the male who had transformed my purse into a diary). We were crowded round, flicking through a stack of photographs which were of the previous dream-scenes.

Dream 154
Dream date: 20 April 2013
I was in a courtyard – with large wooden panelled walls. It was daytime. A chained up lion and tiger were attacking one another nearby. I ran away, entering a second-hand bookshop, by way of a narrow wooden spiral staircase. In the bookshop I saw glass of orange squash. In an adjacent room, seen through a transparent glass wall were four gangsters/henchmen (recurrent themes from a dream of 10 April 2013) who were pursuing me, but could not get past the glass wall.

Dream 155
Dream date: 21 April 2013
I saw a close-up of my eyes – I was wearing dramatic black kohl eyeliner – thick and winged out at the edges. I knew I had a job interview. I then found myself in a bar, by some stairs, leaning against a radiator. I was talking to PS on a payphone, but cannot recall the contents of the conversation. I ended the call and walked over to the bar. It was wooden-panelled and dimly lit. I sat at the bar on a tall barstool, next to a young blonde lady. We were talking and drinking. A middle-aged woman entered the bar, to my left. She was tall, thin and completely bald – dressed like a traditional Romany Gypsy. She said: “was your stepfather single when he got with your mum?” She was aggressive in her tone of voice. I started to tell her that it was none of her business, but she snapped at me: “I want HER to answer!” indicating my blonde acquaintance.

Dream 156
Dream date: 22 April 2013
I was in a strange, unfamiliar house, which I knew to be located on the same road as my nan’s house. It was evening and lights were on. The room was quite large, with a front door to the left, directly leading to the lounge/kitchen. To my right was a dining table and chairs. In the centre of the room was an old-fashioned dresser, with many items arranged on the shelves. I was standing in front of this dresser/shelving unit – which was freestanding and almost reached the ceiling. Behind the dresser, to the right (directly in front of the front door) was a huge mattress, on the floor. Three female children were sleeping or lying on the mattress I felt the presence of other persons in the room. A middle-aged woman – brunette, fat and wearing a white apron – approached me. She said: “my husband is an evil paedophile!” I looked at the items on the shelves and saw – amongst other things – that there was a doll, a tin of baked beans and a large pool of blood. Looking back towards the children on the mattress, I could now see the husband – a small middle-aged man with a bald head and black beard. He leered suggestively at me and I felt disgusted and in fear for the safety of the children.

Dream 157
Dream date: 23 April 2013
I was Beyonce Knowles. I met my stepdad, GM, and he asked if I wanted to get into the porn industry. I said I would, but only if I could perform with my husband, Jay-Z as my co-star. This conversation took place in a dimly lit ‘Hollywood-style’ dressing-room – there was a mirror with light bulbs mounted around the edge. I was seated on the edge of the dressing table, wearing a gold sparkly outfit. I was then driving in an open top car with Jay Z, telling him that we were going to make a pornographic movie.

Dream 158
Dream date: 25 April 2013
I was on a holiday with VW – we were both single parents, although our children were not with us. We were apparently fighting custody battles. We were by the seaside and decided to take a boat trip. This boat trip entailed us boarding a small sailboat and then sailing out to sea where we would meet a ‘leaping vessel’ – a dolphin-shaped boat which jumped out of the sea and landed again and again – like a flying fish. When we got close enough to the ‘leaping vessel’, we would have to jump from the sailboat onto it, avoiding falling into the sea. The water was clear and a beautiful sapphire blue and the sun was shining. There were many other tourists surrounding us. When we sailed out to the ‘leaping vessel’, VW managed to jump aboard easily, but I was too scared to try myself and I feared falling into the gap between the two boats and drowning. I felt disappointed and remained on the sailboat. The scene changed and we were back on dry land. Our children were with us – one each – although they were not next to us. We decided that we had better buy some food for the children. My child was a baby boy, although I did not actually see him – or VW’s child. We approached an open-air restaurant, which had a long white counter. This was located on the promenade – it did not look like Sheringham, but perhaps Great Yarmouth or another larger, sea-side tourist town. VW ordered fish and chips for her child. I was not sure what I actually ordered, but I was given a small shot glass with a tiny amount of caramel sauce in the bottom. The scene changed and I was in a small square room, which was completely filled with a mattress on the floor. There was a shelf running along all four walls, at around waist-height. EB was there, and also a tall, slim brunette woman, who looked like a model. She was wearing a black mini-dress and had very long, tanned legs. I set the shot glass of caramel sauce down on the shelf. EB told me to have lesbian sex with the beautiful brunette woman – which I did. The scene changed and I was then in my nan’s living-room. It was evening and the lights were on in the room. Various members of my family were in the room sitting on chairs, as was EB. The brunette woman came in, pushing a baby’s pushchair, in which was her one-year-old daughter, dressed in pink. On the television was a graphic depiction of brain surgery – a scalpel slicing through a pink, bleeding brain. I thought it was inappropriate for the baby to witness this gruesome image, although there was no sound. The brunette woman asked us to babysit her baby, which I agreed. She handed me the shot glass with the caramel sauce.

Dream 159
Dream date: 27 April 2013
There was a nuclear holocaust – the area I was standing in was war-torn and levelled to the ground, full of rubble. Myself and the other persons – all in family groups, dressed in rags and carrying their salvaged belongings, were exiled. The sky was grey and ash was falling down on us. I saw PP with his wife and child. An elderly woman told me that the nuclear holocaust had happened because the child (a baby) had been born. I said: “no, it’s because of me reading that book”. I am not able to recall exactly what book I was referring to, but I felt guilty about being responsible for the war and the nuclear bombs which had destroyed the world. I also felt guilty that the birth of PP’s child was wrongly being held to be the cause. I seemed to be on a plateau above further nuclear wasteland. I looked down and saw there were games/contests being played by other refugees, but it did not look like fun, rather like it was some form of strenuous battle – some people were using long wooden poles to beat one another. Everyone else – not involved in the ‘battle’ were erecting what looked like wigwams from rags and scraps of dirty material.

Dream 160
Dream date: 2 May 2013
I was in my nan’s house, standing facing the door to the small bedroom, doing squats. I was then in another (unfamiliar) house, which in the dream I knew to be a house belonging to my mum and stepdad. They had asked me to housesit while they were away on holiday. I was pleased to have the house to myself. I then discovered that they had also asked my stepbrother and his partner, NM to come to look after the house with me. My stepbrother had organised a party in the house, which was now crowded with his friends, who I did not know. I sat at the dining table and was joined by Nm who asked me to come and work for her in her salon, but I refused.

Dream 161
Dream date: 5 May 2013
I was standing in some form of clinic or hospital with a dark-haired male. I did not recognise him from real-life, but in the dream, he was my boyfriend. We were approached by a girl – petite with shoulder length brown hair. She looked awful – really skinny, pale, with blotchy, blemished skin and bald patches on her head. She was using a zimmer-frame to walk and looked like the ‘living dead’. I asked my dream ‘boyfriend’ if she was on drugs. He told me she was a heroin addict. I spoke to the girl and she said that she was dying of AIDS. I asked her how she knew my boyfriend and she confirmed that he was her ex-boyfriend. I was anxious and asked my boyfriend if he had had unprotected sexual intercourse with this girl, knowing that she had HIV/AIDS. He confessed he had.

Dream 162
Dream date: 11 May 2013
I was detached from the initial dream-scene, just a passive observer watching the action. At first, I was not aware of exactly where I was or what I was watching. The colours of my environment were extremely bright and luminous – almost neon. I suddenly realised that this was the film Trainspotting – although it was very different from the real-life plot. I realised this, by recognising the characters from the film. They were standing on a fluorescent green field, staring at a train track. The action was very static and I could not hear any dialogue – I was just able to see vast, panoramic shots of the main characters standing below me, as if I was above the scene, looking down. As soon as I became aware that this was a strange, unfamiliar version of the film and questioned why it was different (using my actual knowledge of this film) I realised I was dreaming and became lucid. The scene suddenly changed and I was riding on a child’s tricycle, speeding down empty hallways and round corners. This seemed to go on for quite a while and was quite exciting at first, but soon I wanted to meet some other dream characters. I willed myself to get off the tricycle and enter a room. In the room – which was decorated in quite a student-y, bohemian way, which lots of sofas and cushions and wall hangings, I found a group of people which included EB and RF. RF was telling EB that he had to host a rap battle for him. I looked over at a large black male (over six foot tall and quite chunky), who was one of the rappers taking part in the battle. He was wearing a T-shirt – navy blue. His arms were bent at right angles, and behind him – as if he was standing with his hands placed on his kidneys. The flesh on his arms was rotten and peeling off. His bones were exposed, especially at the elbows, and it appeared that these bones – which were perforated, cracked and discoloured, were on the surface of the skin, like bony-armour. These bones fit very loosely with gaps underneath them, resembling armour even more as a result of this. There was no blood on show, but the man’s arms were in a terrible condition and I could hardly bear to look at them. EB said: “they look like that because he has MS (multiple sclerosis)”. I could not really control much of this lucid dream and as soon as I entered the room where the other dream characters were, it was as though my lucidity faded and I entered a normal dream state again.